Popular books on intuition, or “how to be psychic” generally see authors alleging that many of us, in childhood, used to be intuitive but that over time we either grew out of it or lost the ability.
If that were true, think how much nicer we’d all be if parts of ourselves just vanished from lack of use. Like for instance if my impatience had disappeared from lack of use—that’d be great–but I’m sorry to report, no such luck.
So, does ignoring your intuition, over time, cause your intuition (aka awareness) to diminish? (The quick answer is NO)
Here’s a little peak (with permission) of two friends.
He accepted from an early age (five) that he knew things others didn’t. Knowing stuff wasn’t odd to him, on the contrary, it seemed utterly normal. “It was just me”. Telling his parents, aunts and cousins things about their health, relationships or work never went off well though. Usually his casual remarks were chalked up to childhood nosiness and probably overhearing things he shouldn’t.
When he started to get punished for speaking about the (correct) things he knew David decided he’d keep his mouth shut. Over time, he began to ignore the information he gleaned from awareness because it proved more trouble than it was worth.
How does David use that intel now?
“I call it gut instinct. Mostly I use it for work. If I’m faced with a tough decision, if there’s conflict I can’t see how to resolve …I trust my gut about which direction to take. I’m never wrong; other than that? I don’t really notice it working anywhere else.”
Caron always saw things or heard advice like talking in her head. Like the time her sister came home after curfew with the excuse she’d been out with a girlfriend and forgot the time. Caron (the annoying little sister) blurted out the exact location her sister, and a boy had parked to “make out”. They were both punished; Caron for being a tattletale and her sister for being late, lying and “parking”.
Caron, no matter how accurate her visions, or eerily accurate advice, was largely ignored by her parents and she was deemed highly imaginative. Her sister would (frequently) call her, “a little shit”, for all her “stories”.
Ah sisters, you gotta love them.
How does Caron use her intuition now?
(Laughing) I wish I had it like I used too. I used to feel so good about it, so good about me. Now? Hmmm yeah sometimes, it still comes, my dreams for sure, but nothing I can control or use like I used too. I think I kind of just stopped listening, you know? It’s not with me all the time (the intel) like it used to be. Although sometimes when I feel a lot of compassion for a friend or coworker I suddenly “hear” what to say to make them feel better. People think I’m wise but I’m not, maybe I’m knowing though. Just listening and saying what I know to sooth the hurt.
So, does neglecting, ignoring or rejecting your intuition (which comes from stilling your thoughts in order to access awareness) over time cause intuition (the intel) to diminish?
At any age, being minimized, ridiculed, ignored or rejected hurts. Our families are powerful influencers. We want to be loved, accepted and recognized so over time (and it doesn’t take much) the parts of us that we perceive as unattractive or unacceptable we’ll tend to downplay. This is a classic example of shrinking ourselves to fit in and be accepted. It’s also a typical case of “would you please change so I can feel better”.
Childhood is typically the time we begin to let go of awareness and embrace expanding our consciousness through educating our minds. There is so much to learn! Thus the awareness of recognizing and acting on so-called “intuitive” information diminishes—but not the transmission itself. Instead we begin ignoring that part of ourselves; until one day it’s such a tiny little sound that it’s super easy to pretend it isn’t there at all.
Being criticized for being a fabricator of truth by a family member is especially hurtful for children. When we’re kids we depend on the ones who (unwittingly) hurt us. Dependence makes us eager to please and desperate to conform. We want to feel safe and accepted—cemented to our tribe at all costs–even if it means suppressing natural normal parts of ourselves.
If you were constantly running and were suddenly told how completely ridiculous running was and by extension you were, how no one else ran (like ever) and if you did it again you’d be ostracized or punished, do you think you’d stop running?
And if you stopped running would that automatically mean you’d lost your capacity to do so? You’d still have legs, so it’s not like your legs shrunk or fell off. Your legs are still there, you use them, but not for running. Just you know, walking, stumbling around, kicking some ass, standing in line—that sort of thing. But running? No way man, that ship has sailed. Nope, lost my ability to do that!
Some people never did feel particularly intuitive, which doesn’t mean they weren’t/aren’t. Some haven’t seen their intuition in years; some only during times of stress, or a crisis. Sometimes when deeply hurt (think emotional pain or grief) their intuition comes to the rescue. Which is to say a long ignored part of you expands to confront a situation in your fullness as a human being.
Intuition is meant to be used—just like every other part of us. There are no exceptions—if you’re alive and currently on this planet. It’s energetically built into us. Believe it or not, like it or not—and that’s a fact.
Intuition, like your legs are always there; whether you ever want to use your legs to run or not. You were born with legs and you’re going to die with them. Whether you choose to use them (like the intel from awareness that we call intuition) is up to you.
Caveat: Legs are a bad example if they get chopped off in, say a motorcycle accident. Then my example doesn’t work because intuition, which is another word for awareness, can’t be removed or separated from you. If you have developmental delay or autism this does not affect the powerhouse that is your innate ability to be aware. You cannot be separated from awareness and being aware has nothing to do with the intellect.
Here’s the thing. Anyone who suggests that, 1) you’re not intuitive or that there’s no such thing or, 2) your intuition diminishes—through lack of use—knows very little about intuition in general, and even less about awareness.
NOTE: If you’re one of those unfortunate souls who don’t believe in intuition please know it isn’t my job to prove it to you. However, if to the best of your knowledge you’ve never felt your intuition but want too—stick with me. I’ll show you how to find your own unique expression and how to use it.
I began speaking about life after death from a very young age. I also had “memories” of my mother’s life from a time before I was born. My mother had no idea how to deal with this (who would?) and while she always verbally discounted the intelligence I shared, her eyes said differently. When our eyes met, I felt acknowledged and affirmed even without her words of affirmation (of which there were none). Still, she knew I was telling the truth and I knew she believed me. This was one of the very big gifts my mom gave me—the gift of recognition.
We will never be whole unless we embrace all of our parts and we’ll never know the true meaning of power, the very thing the world and its people, are struggling with now, unless we embrace all of ourselves.
To be real you gotta be willing to accept the ordinary and the ugly about everything. Until then you won’t be able to accept what’s truly great about yourself either.